Infidelity Busters
This is just sad. Divorce the fucker already if he spends more time on the computer than on you, instead of paying this person to wade through chatrooms for you.

The testimonials are funny. My favorite one is where the guy, after he's caught, is discovered to be "schizophrenic." Do auditory/visual hallucinations really have anything to do with cybersex? His wife also writes, "Now, I continue to knead my relationship like a slab of moist clay." Gross.

Warning - crap background music.
Sunday, November 26, 2000

Floating Henry Rollins Head Haiku
Comics involving Henry Rollins' floating head, and a few choice syllables.

very angry man
he sings, but mostly he yells
so where is his neck?

It reminded me of that song by some bratty pop-punk band that said something about playing lotto with someone's mom and how henry rollins is no fun.
Friday, November 24, 2000

Barbie Bondage
It's funny how hard it is to differentiate this from actual porn. Aside from the fact that there are no nipples and no pubic hair (oh wait - I guess the latter qualification doesn't really apply), I see all the other elements. Eighties hair, fake smiles, stiff posing, lots of plastic - all that's missing is a bunch of paunchy Ken-dolls with mullets and greying body hair!
Friday, November 24, 2000

The Spy Baguette Cam

Watch the French fetching their bread - while it's still warm. Watch them discussing it. Watch their dogs leaving heaped steaming befoulments all over the place. And then watch them discuss it some more.

I just saw a guy in a beret come out the door with five baguettes. What a man!
Thursday, November 23, 2000

Operation Clambake
If any of this is true, Scientology is even weirder than I had originally thought. Check out the Xenu bits.
Thursday, November 23, 2000

Dealing With Fake Works

With the growing popularity of cat art and the consequent rapid rise in prices being paid for cat paintings of all descriptions, it is not surprising that a certain number of unscrupulous people have attempted to fake feline works of art in order to line their pockets.

This is funny on so many levels.

Also, they have tests to judge your cat's artistic talent.
Thursday, November 23, 2000

Dream Tech International: Price List
This is funny. I like how under snakes it says "Just buy another one!"
Wednesday, November 22, 2000

The Biological Weapons Threat
Fun germy things. Reading too much shit like this can really get you paranoid. My throat is starting to tickly, and one of my eyes fell out. I'm sure it's nothing.

The RAF was just so spunky.
Wednesday, November 22, 2000

Nuclear Survival
You know, just in case any national pride decides to billow and swell anytime soon.
Wednesday, November 22, 2000

Cold War Cards

Pictured on the reverse are those first four mushroom clouds as they billow and swell with national pride.

I love these. I want a set.
Wednesday, November 22, 2000

Slow Wave

Slow Wave is a collective dream diary authored by different people from around the world, and drawn as a comic strip by Jesse Reklaw.

I like this idea.
Wednesday, November 22, 2000

Coke club at UVic
Yes, this is my school.

No greek crap. Just a lot of kids who don't want no one fucking with their caffeine options.

It would never have happened if not for that annoying little curly girl who's in those Pepsi commercials.

It is a weird, weird place. Don't even get me started on the whole "Heterosexual march" thing a while back. Oh god.
Wednesday, November 22, 2000

The Monsters In My Tummy
This is really cool.

As I was looking through it, there's this one image that's an x-ray with a fuzzy-looking shape holding a trident. It reminded me of those mummified "mermaid" things in some Ripley's Believe it or Not museum. That place freaked me out as a child.

I was obsessed with the iron maiden they had on display though. Or was that a different museum?
Wednesday, November 22, 2000

The Lawnchair Pilot
I don't even like lawnchairs when they are on the ground.
Wednesday, November 22, 2000

Duct Tape
Someone once gave me my birthday present completely swaddled in duct tape. Since then I've kind of had a fondness for it.

(Except for when I'm taping up the breasts of goth-girls, but that's a whole other story. It doesn't really look very bra-ish. The end result is more like a boobie-shelf of some kind).
Wednesday, November 22, 2000

More more more
Link it up like the Andrea True Connection, baby.

(Sorry, no actual porn-star disco was on the previous page of my pita.)
Wednesday, November 22, 2000