Munchy Food Industries
Lexus - high in calcium!
Friday, April 6, 2001

Reformation Polka
Ach mein Gott, es ausgezeichnet ist!
Friday, March 23, 2001

Murnau's Nosferatu
Watch everyone's favorite vampire bring plague to Bremen - before that whole "I am so tormented and romantic that I must wear velvet and lace cuffs" thing got started.
Friday, March 23, 2001

Turkish Hollywood

The era was called The Turkish New Wave and, as with any gold rush, there were a couple of nuggets and a lot more dirt. The more enterprising Turkish filmmakers decided that they shouldn't even have to write their own movies, they could just poach from American Hollywood's scripts, cobble together some cheap props and Turk actors, and boom!

I'd like to see Badi and Supermen Donuyor. They sound wonderfully disorienting.
Friday, March 23, 2001

Reviews of Taco Bell Menu Items
Because you know they aren't for eating.
Friday, March 23, 2001

The Strangest Story Ever Told!
Jesus didn't die for our sins. He snuck away, took the silk road to Japan, got married, and had kids!
Friday, March 23, 2001

1950 Kotex ad
Teenygirl-magazine-quiz, with sly little references to "problem days." Are they actually suggesting that "Hippy Hannah" should bash her "hefty hips" against the wall every night?

Be a social success, even when you're bleeding from the crotch!
Friday, March 23, 2001

The Jean-Paul Sartre Cookbook

I have realized that the traditional omelet form (eggs and cheese) is bourgeois. Today I tried making one out of cigarette, some coffee, and four tiny stones. I fed it to Malraux, who puked. I am encouraged, but my journey is still long.

This made me laugh a lot.
Thursday, March 15, 2001

Things my girlfriend and I have argued about
Hideously annoying, gross man and his crazy girlfriend. A match made in heaven. Too bad they went and reproduced.
Thursday, March 15, 2001

Jumpin Jammerz
I can't decide whether this is funny, or really creepy.
Thursday, March 15, 2001

Mr. Coffee Nerves
Old advertising comics. Drinking coffee makes you an inadequate parent! Also see The Philip Morris cigarette midget.
Thursday, March 15, 2001

Spiders.must.die.net
This is kind of fun to read, although that part is completely separate from its original purpose.
Thursday, March 15, 2001

Collecting Boar Semen

Allow the boar to thrust a couple of times, then grab onto the tip of the penis. It is important that your hands are warm to prevent cold-shocking the sperm, so in a cold barn, keep your collecting hand in your pocket prior to collection.

Don't say I never taught you anything.
Thursday, March 15, 2001

Previous entries
like a hole in the head
Thursday, March 15, 2001